Yesterday was Bubba’s birthday. Yes, my mom celebrated her 86th big day! An afternoon phone call to her, usually short and sweet because she is a busy lady with places to go and things to do (She doesn’t like to be late…), was full of excitement and animation. I listened to the details of her morning…
First was her wake-up phone call from my uncle (Auntie’s husband). Mom has always been very close to her sister’s husband, a delightfully energetic man with the most amazing singing voice. For years Uncle and Auntie have traditionally called close family members on their birthday to jointly sing a Happy Birthday song — always quite funny because Uncle is the singer, and Auntie, well, she didn’t have the greatest voice, but her own style was terribly comical! Priceless… But with Auntie passing away back in October, my mother was thrilled to tears hearing Uncle’s familiar song, following their couple tradition on his own. Mom told me she was so touched that he carried on a tradition she very much loved, and was so glad that her relationship with him had not suffered as a result of each of them losing sister and wife. It was bittersweet, a bit sad, but also very comforting. Many thanks to my Uncle for his kindness. His wife is gone, but he continues to go out of his way to love her sister and other family members. Helping others when you are hurting is so healthy, and helps facilitate one’s own grieving… I am proud of him. And I admire my mother…
Then Bubba told me that her second big thrill on this special birthday was a phone call from her two young great-granddaughters (3 1/2 years and 11 months). She couldn’t believe that the oldest could carry on such an active phone conversation, and the little one was chattering up a storm, key words being “hi,” “cat,” “dada,” and “bye.” This phone chat has heightened mom’s excitement about visiting these girls and the rest of my family in mid-April. Can’t wait to share the time together! I am very happy that mom is excited and looking forward to visiting. After her visit last summer we weren’t sure that she would be up for a visit this year, but it is going to happen, which we all consider a special gift.
Then my sister visited mom, just leaving as I called. And I suspect the rest of her day was filled with more contact from family and friends. I smile knowing that Bubba had a lovely birthday, much deserved.
Recently I read something about having a longevity personality — having certain traits or even modifying your behavior to fake these traits are said to add years to your life, according to Patrick Hill, Ph.D., psychology researcher at the University of Illinois. Bubba has all three of the characteristics that may boost her life expectancy.
1. Her glass is half full. A study that analyzed 243 elderly people (average age: 97.6) found that most were more optimistic and easygoing than the general population. That would be Bubba…
2. She is everyone’s pal. Having strong social relationships can raise survival odds by 50% found researchers from Brigham Young University. Bubba is a natural social butterfly…
3. She is never late. Conscientiousness (being detail oriented and responsible and always wanting to do a good job) is consistently associated with longevity, says, Dr. Hill. A perfect description of Bubba’s nature…
Without a doubt Bubba has a longevity personality! In fact, she has a goal to be invited to the 90’s birthday bash at her senior living complex! She has to be 90 to be included… When mom makes up her mind to work toward something, she does so wholeheartedly. Fiercely determined!
So, what do we do if we don’t have a natural longevity personality as Bubba does? Here are some tips to help you practice:
1. If your outlook could be sunnier, write down a few things you are grateful for each day.
2. To help yourself become more social, start small. Invite some friends to lunch, or consider starting a book club.
3. You can raise your conscientiousness by making (and using) to-do lists.
I wish you and long and happy life!