Navigating Change

Debi Levine, MS, LMFT

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What is Mindfulness?

January 5, 2017 by Debi

An inspiring yoga class earlier this week that focused on meditation and mindfulness has really helped me stay focused in the moment for many days. It has felt good to feel energetic, yet relaxed, calm, and organized. Reflecting back on this Friday afternoon I realize that I got an awful lot done during this week with less internal stress than usual. Sweet…

So what exactly is “mindfulness?” There is much written about it and many different perspectives to help with the definition and practice.

Here is how Rick Hanson, Ph.D. describes mindfulness. I think he does a nice job of explaining the concept and how it can help us as we go through each day…

1. Mindfulness is a means to an end, not an end in itself.

2. Mindfulness itself is sustained attention to something, typically with some meta-cognitive awareness of the quality of one’s attention. Mindfulness itself is morally neutral. A burglar could be very mindful. If people want, they can add other qualities to mindfulness, such as an attitude of acceptance and friendliness toward the objects of attention, such as toward whatever may pass through the mind.

3. Mindfulness itself does not try to change the objects of attention. But mindfulness is not necessarily the only thing happening in the mind! If one likes, one could add some effort, hopefully wise, to change the objects of attention. A person could be mindful of her stress and negative thoughts for a while; then she could both be mindful and make and effort to shift what is in her mind; finally, she could be mindful of the results in her efforts.

4. As you can see, a certain set of presumptions have grown up around mindfulness in the past few decades that actually are additions to the original idea promoted by the Buddha 2500 years ago. In particular, people talk as if an explicit stance against working with the contents of awareness is an innate feature of mindfulness, and it is not. I recommend reading my paper, The Noble Eightfold Path (Hanson), for more on this.

5. Mindfulness itself is always helpful. And sometimes it is useful for a person to drop any effort to shift the contents of awareness in any direction whatsoever; sometimes this kind of “choice awareness” alone helps negative thoughts release.

6. But often mindfulness alone is not enough. A lot of crud fills the mind, and it persists because the brain is a physical object that does not tend to change unless something changes it (in effect, Newton’s First Law). When you appreciate how embodied we are, and how much the brain is a learning organ that builds structure that maintains unless it is actually changed, you get very interested in effective and efficient effort. Since neurons that fire together wire together, keeping negative material in awareness can actually deepen its hold upon you.

7. In essence, there are two great elements in psychological healing, everyday well being and effectiveness and personal growth and spiritual practice: being with and working with (in Buddhism :Right Mindfulness and Right Effort). These are the two great wings that can help us fly.

Each wing has strengths. And the wings working together — mindfulness improves our efforts and it takes skillful effort to be stably mindful.

Then you can make a free and wise choice, moment by moment, as to what will do the most good for oneself, or one’s client — lean toward pure mindfulness or lean toward mindful efforts. Both are beautiful and help us fly.

Share your thoughts on mindfulness with us…

Filed Under: Aging, Anxiety & Stress, Relationships, Uncategorized

Insanity Defined…

October 13, 2016 by Debi

This is a very interesting blog post about the definition of “insanity.” Strangely, it is what seems to be happening in the lives of many right now…. What do you think?

https://tomasacker.com/2016/08/31/the-real-definition-of-insanity/

 

Filed Under: Aging, Anxiety & Stress, Uncategorized

The Birds

May 18, 2016 by Debi

There is a bird who has taken up residence in our yard, arriving back in the early spring with her mate. A pair of beautiful cardinals, soul mates, I suspect. Their nest is in a tall tree in our back yard not far from a tool shed. They raised their babies this spring, but I have not seen the young ones lately. The female seems to have more time on her hands recently. She is quite chatty, almost obnoxious at times, and does not appear to be afraid of humans — or to speak her mind. Unloading groceries from the trunk of my car, she tries to get my attention, moving closer and closer, quite at ease. When I stop and look at her she tilts her head and stares at me, almost waiting for me to converse with her. When I do say something, she listens for a moment, and then clearly replies. We have gone back and forth a few times, and I hope my neighbors don’t think I have lost my mind talking to a bird in the yard…

Lately I am beginning to think there must be some sort of strange connection I have with this bird — to a past life or person??  I cannot know for sure, but she has so much to say, and I wish I could understand her conversation and message, which is very strong and compelling. Sometimes I wonder if she is simply trying to tell me that sharing one’s voice is so important in our terribly complicated world…

The male partner of this intriguing couple chirps most often in the mornings, making a predictable zigzag pattern about the yard. He is a regular on nearby tree branches. I smile at his warm greetings, soft and melodic, as he sits so close to windows that I could almost reach out and touch him. Sometimes I can see his eyes. They are kind and gentle.

My father always loved birds, especially cardinals, and I wonder if this strange exchange with our bird-neighbors is my dad’s way of reminding me of so many of the important values that he and my mom taught and modeled throughout their long lives. Are these birds to remind me of what matters most in life — treating others in a way that is both special and respectful? Like good neighbors and friends? Taking time to greet, to chat, to show interest and connection, to care…

Pair of cardinals

Filed Under: Relationships, Uncategorized, Warm Fuzzies

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